“You proceed to take various angled shots of the avocado being sliced, the blueberries getting washed, and your bearded boyfriend plucking feathers from the partridges because the Farmer’s Market only sold them with feathers, because plucking out the feathers themselves would be too mean and they’re the nice kind of farmers who kill with love. And now that your meal looks professional and Alexandra Gaurnaschelli would approve of it (but Scott Conant would totally get the one piece of undercooked bird) there is a great final product shot taken, complete with two Coronas because you were feeling summery. “Ah, the good life,” you caption, wanting me to be simultaneously awed and intimidated by your domesticity. “This looks awesome! Wow!! You two are so cute!!!” writes jealous girl between drafts of her latest Game of Thrones fan fiction. That’s when you know you’ve done it: you are officially the greatest woman on the entire planet.”—
Well, I took (most of) your advice, tumblr, and went with the sparkly gold dress. It’s the safest choice, but the most re-wearable and since I won’t know anyone at the wedding, I’d prefer to blend in than stand out this time. Once my friends start getting married (hey Alexi!), I can mix it up with something slightly more offbeat.
I plan to style it with some black Calvin Klein platform pumps, a black envelope clutch, bronzey-gold earrings, peach and gold makeup, and maybe one of these ultra pretty hair accessories from Anthropologie:
Alright Tumblr, since I obviously can’t make any decisions of my own (#libraproblems) I need your help again with this dress situation.
I went to Macy’s yesterday and tried on about a million dresses, texting pictures to my mom after each dress. I narrowed it down to a few favorites, but I’m still having trouble choosing.
This gold sparkly one was cute, but I wasn’t convinced it was the most flattering to my figure.
This red print was cute, but probably the most casual of the dresses. Maybe a bit too casual for a wedding?
I felt really pretty in this floral satin, but… do guys “get” floor-length floral print dresses? Also, do I look like I stepped out of 1994?
This gorgeous hydrangea colored dress was my absolute favorite, but I have a feeling it’s much too formal for this small, upstate NY wedding. Thoughts? (Editor’s Note: Ignore the fact that one boob looks higher than the other. In my haste to take the picture, I didn’t adjust the straps properly.)
I had pretty much decided on this silk striped one, but felt that it was just a tad too tight and clinging around the hips/butt. They only had one two sizes up, which was much too big, so I called French Connection and they had the last one in my size at the store. I went all the way down to the Soho store, only to find that it was in the wrong color! The red and maroon stripe just wasn’t as pretty. I could still get the larger size and have it taken in, or go with the slightly tighter one. Even the size that was a little bit too small would need the straps shortened, anyway. The other con? This was far and away the most expensive of the dresses.
I may end up doing some more searching today at the boutiques around Soho. What do you think? Should I go back for one of these?
Is this entire post as obnoxious as I think it is?
“My mission, should I choose to accept it, is to find peace with exactly who and what I am. To take pride in my thoughts, my appearance, my talents, my flaws and to stop this incessant worrying that I can’t be loved as I am.”—Anais Nin (via perspectiveandstripes)
“Yo, honestly, when people tell me some bullshit about how they’re moderate Republicans, all I hear is ‘I think rich people paying income tax is a greater injustice than racism.’”—yoisthisracist.com (via thekeyofhappy)(via chasingdunamis)
“Fashion is one of the very few forms of expression in which women have more freedom than men. And I don’t think it’s an accident that it’s typically seen as shallow, trivial, and vain. It is the height of irony that women are valued for our looks, encouraged to make ourselves beautiful and ornamental… and are then derided as shallow and vain for doing so. And it’s a subtle but definite form of sexism to take one of the few forms of expression where women have more freedom, and treat it as a form of expression that’s inherently superficial and trivial. Like it or not, fashion and style are primarily a women’s art form. And I think it gets treated as trivial because women get treated as trivial.”—Fashion is a Feminist Issue: Greta Christina (via tinybows)(via femmesandfamily)(via lakrymosa)
I’m going to a wedding next month and I want to find the perfect dress. It’s the first wedding I’ll be attending where I’m not part of the wedding party, as an adult. After years of training myself away from strapless dresses and drop waists, I’ve finally gotten pretty good at knowing what styles flatter my figure. I’ve picked a few (ok, more than a few) that I think might work, but I’d love your input in narrowing it down. It’s been oddly difficult to find something modest, but pretty, and age appropriate. It sometimes feels like my options are Forever21 or Mother of the Bride.
Keep in mind: I am 25 years old, 5’6, hourglass shape, and very pale. The wedding is during the day, outdoors in a rose garden, with an evening indoor reception. The bridesmaids are wearing a shade of “peacock” so I’m staying away from anything that approaches turquoise. Obviously, white is out. I don’t know the bride or groom or how traditional they are, so I’m also choosing to skip black (though I’m open to considering black prints). I’ll be meeting most of my date’s friends and family for the first time.
I much prefer to try everything on, so I’ll be seeking out a few favorites in store this week and the real deciding factor will be how they fit in person. But in the meantime I’m desperate for a little direction.
“It’s like we’re all attempting to write honestly about growing through our third decade with smirks on our faces. Smirking in the face of honesty or fear. Everyone is even becoming lazier with the twisty explanations we throw out, when we should be, as writers, searching for aptness and truth; enhancement rather than decoration… And our exaggerations! Oh how we love to get hyperbolic. And please, believe me when I say that I truly do love to. Maybe that was Eggers’ fault. I’m even a fan of using ‘literally’ as a bit, as an obviously extreme stretch. But don’t preface the word with the initiation of a simile. Was it like that? Or was it that? Or are we using ‘like’ in the Valley Girl slang fashion because it’s cool to be like totes moderne? That’s a silly veil and we all use it a bit too often. But if we keep writing like this (yes, we, for I too am guilty of this laziness) then that’s what we’re gonna keep writing. And we’ll know nothing but jokes and how to wink behind peoples backs.”—
I'm from Atlanta, Georgia, I want to go to either Columbia or NYU. I feel dumb for saying this, but I'm afraid I won't fit into the New York City "scene"...But I really want to go to either one of those colleges because they both offer really good programs. I just don't want to feel alone if I move there. What should I do???
Here’s the thing - there’s not really a scene here. Almost everyone I know here came from somewhere else. Some from other states, and many from other countries. I imagine there is a Columbia “scene” and an NYU “scene” and typical students from each. But I also imagine that these schools attract all sorts of people for different reasons, and that there, as anywhere, you will meet people with common interests.
Keep in mind that everyone’s experience will be different. I spent a summer at NYU, participating in their internship program, but I didn’t have much of a chance to mingle with other students. However, of this I am sure: they all share a common desire to live in New York and go to those schools. Those are two very expensive schools that require a lot of work to get into and to stay in, no matter what program you choose. There are good schools everywhere. There are less expensive schools and different environments and campuses and professors. Visit them all. Talk to the students. Ask questions.
My favorite high school English teacher once told me that the school itself matters very little. You will choose your school based on how you feel when you walk around the campus and imagine yourself living there. Being able to happily envision yourself in a place is important when other variables are great and your mind is so far from made up.
When I was going to school in Canada, I dated a boy who went to NYU. He was in the film program there - the same one I had dreamed of attending in high school, when my parents told me I couldn’t apply because New York City was dangerous and expensive. So I went to Queen’s University because I loved the feeling I got when I walked the cobblestone streets of Kingston, Ontario. I loved the ivy-covered buildings and the ice rink in the town square. I loved going to school there and my boyfriend was miserable in New York. He was lonely and tired. He talked about dropping out. In spite of this, he found things to love in the city, and he showed them to me when I visited. I fell in love with him and with the city and then out of love with him. My romance with the city continues and I made it my priority to move here as soon as I could after graduation.
My parents were not wrong. New York city is dangerous and expensive. It is also beautiful and interesting and changing all the time. Most of all, it is absolutely filled to the brim with people who are new and scared and so excited to meet you.
People really don’t like to hear success explained away as luck — especially successful people. As they age, and succeed, people feel their success was somehow inevitable. They don’t want to acknowledge the role played by accident in their lives. There is a reason for this: the world does not want to acknowledge it either.
Life’s outcomes, while not entirely random, have a huge amount of luck baked into them. Above all, recognize that if you have had success, you have also had luck — and with luck comes obligation. You owe a debt, and not just to your Gods. You owe a debt to the unlucky.
“Having my first apartment all to myself is incredible, but it’s like literally taking an enormous pile of your money, setting it on fire in front of you, and running around in circles cackling.”—Chelsea Fagan’s Blog
“Our wandering is meant to lead back toward ourselves. This is the paradox: we set out on adventures to gain deeper access to ourselves; we travel to transcend our own limitations. Travel should be an art through which our restlessness finds expression.”—Reclaiming Travel - NYTimes.com (via naisae)
“By then I knew that everything good and bad left an emptiness when it stopped. But if it was bad, the emptiness filled up by itself. If it was good you could only fill it by finding something better.”—Ernest Hemingway (via captainstickylove)
“An intimacy develops among a circle of people, you do everything together, you can’t imagine this tight cadre ever breaking apart, and then, quite mundanely, one friend slips away, and then another. It might be because they’re moving across town or to another part of the country. It might be because they’ve started a new relationship, or are getting married or having a kid or changing jobs. It might be because everyone’s getting older and more preoccupied, busy. And, of course, it might simply be that everyone’s become a little bored with one another, doing the same things over and over, hearing and telling the same stories.”
If you ever want to know if someone’s a serial killer, have a friend watch inconspicuously when they hug you. If they open their eyes and fixate on a spot in the distance without smiling, they’re definitely evil.